Why I Have No Time For Complainers

This is an interesting topic to write about and one I honestly cannot wait to delve into with you, especially as a lot of my friends wanted to see my take on this!  

Well, here goes guys!… I don’t want to hear any complaints!  

Kidding...feedback is always appreciated! Shape 

Complaining?  

We all do it. One comment just leads onto another. It just rolls of the tongue! 

Infact research states that most people complain at least once a minute during a typical conversation! 

[https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/281734] 

‘Oh, the weather is horrible, isn’t it?’ 

Omg, the traffic is so slow, I hate this commute’ 

Work is so boring‘ 

‘I don’t want to wake up early’ 

‘It’s just so cold, why do I live here?’ 

Does that sound familiar to you? 

Unfortunately I can’t be that saint that says, oh that atrocious habit?… oh, me?… No, I don’t do that at all.  

Wishful thinking much?! 

I do it without realising and comfortably so, because it has become a dreaded awful habit! 

Why am I calling it an ‘awful habit?’ Well, what else would you call this ‘activity’ we actively choose to participate in? 

Draining! 

Exhausting! 

Lifeless

I’m a firm believer that you attract whatever energy you give out! 

By constantly complaining, you are allowing yourself to focus on all the things you consider wrong with your day/life. Therefore, through constantly focusing on the negatives, you will only be amplifying them, to the point that they could potentially become major issues for you. For instance, having this negative lens on life is more likely to intensify feelings of anxiety, depression and sadness. 

Moreover, science has also proven this to the case! 

When you complain, you increase your levels of cortisol, also known as the stress hormone. Chronically high levels of cortisol can lead to a variety of health problems, including increased risk of depression, digestive problems, sleep issues, higher blood pressure and even increased risk of heart disease.” 

[https://www.wkbw.com/news/complaining-is-bad-for-your-health-according-to-science] 

Also, did you know that your complaining has negative implications on others? 

Nobody wants to be around negative energy, the kind of people who are always putting a downer on every situation. By constantly complaining to your friends, your habit can easily deflect onto them!  

How crazy is that?! We don’t even realise we are having this damaging impact on them? 

You may have heard the saying that ‘you are the average of your five closest friends’ (Jim Rohn).  

If we focus on this saying – by having you complain around them all the time, they are likely to pick up this habit and also adopt the same outlook on life…with that negative lens! 

Therefore, if instead we focus on looking at everything with a balanced viewpoint, it will naturally help move us away from the negative outlook, and we will feel, needless to say, better about our day/way of being! 

An NYC-based Therapist has shown further support for this by stating how “being positive allows you to handle stressful situations better, which reduces the harmful health effects of stress on your body.” (Kimberly Hershenson, LMSW

[https://www.bustle.com/p/11-surprising-ways-complaining-can-affect-your-health-70324] 

So, do you want to make that positive change?  

Here are my top three helpful tips to steer you away from this habit. 

  1. STOP MAKING EXCUSES FOR IT! 
  • Admit you want to change this habit you actively choose to participate in. 

I know the British are labelled with this habit but we cannot simply shift blame and just assume that, we are the way we are because we are British?  

Erm… No! 

You are the way you are because you decide to be that person every morning.  

Don’t want to be that kind of person who complains all the time…?  

Here’s a thought… make that change! 

It’s in our control to change how we function. 

We are humans.  

We have an amazing ability to constantly learn and evolve.  

We just have to make the choice to do so! 

2. TAKE NOTICE. 

  • Take notice for when you are and note what causes you to do so. 

There is usually a pattern for this kind of habit, therefore by being able to pinpoint what prompts you to complain, you are then able to make the change. 

It is vital to first identify these factors so that you can then make that change! 

It might be your job? 

It might be a particular individual/crowd? 

It might be at a particular time, a particular day or time period? 

Keep a watch out for when you do! Shape 

3.  TAKE ACTION. 

  • Actively deploy your change of reducing the amount you complain. 

This can be done by making changes to your routine to make you feel better about what you currently complain about. 

Once you have the awareness over what it is that prompts you to do so, this should be relatively simple and straightforward.  

I hope this has been helpful! 

Thanks, 

Ria Rai 

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